The Desire to Be Loved
The most crucial desire that supersedes all other desires in all of us is "The Desire to Be Loved."
The most crucial desire that supersedes all other desires in all of us is "The Desire to Be Loved."
Love is the most essential need for all. It is not just an emotion but an expression of respect and acknowledgment, a recognition that you matter & are valued. Love is synonymous with acceptance & belonging. The desire to be loved is perhaps the strongest human yearning.
When love fades or is withheld, it can feel like a form of neglect. Neglect can hurt deeply. The yearning for love, for recognition & for respect is a universal human experience that transcends all other desires.
Let me share with you a real-life story that I read from a book.
In 1985, Pavle, a man from Serbia, migrated to Australia to join his three sons who had already settled there. His wife had passed away 5 years ago and loneliness weighed heavily on him. However when his sons sponsored his visa, he believed he was finally going to find solace—reunited with his children & embraced by their love.
But reality turned out to be painfully different. His sons, instead of welcoming him with open hearts, saw him as a burden. They gave him no attention, no warmth. Pavle did not seek a roof over his head; all he longed for was a permanent place in their hearts. But when that love was denied, he began wandering outside, searching for a connection, for even a moment of acknowledgment.
Not knowing English, he struggled to communicate. Yet, he found an unusual way to get noticed. He would wait near a traffic signal and deliberately cross the road when the pedestrian light was red. Cars would halt, drivers would pause, and in those moments—when people stopped for him—he felt seen, respected and valued.
But this ‘offense’ did not go unnoticed. He kept receiving tickets, yet he ignored them, until he was finally summoned to court.
The judge, puzzled by his repeated actions, asked, “Why did you keep crossing the road at the wrong time?” Pavle responded “human” my Lord. The judge told Pavle to be specific. Pavle said, “I loved the way people respected me when I deliberately stopped. By stopping them, I got their attention. They noticed me and when they gave respect, I got my dignity back. I felt valued when they waited for me to reach the other end.”
The judge could not understand Pavle's language and so one of the three sons who were there in the courtroom translated it for the judge.
All that Pavle needed was "Love & Connection' the judge understood.
The courtroom fell silent. The judge, moved beyond words, dismissed the case. He told Pavle not to repeat this. At the same moment, something shifted in his sons. They understood their mistake. They embraced their father, took him home, and promised to care of him.
“To be loved is not a privilege—it is a necessity.” Often, we seek love from the world and sometimes we are left disappointed.
Love yourself first ❤️ love others unconditionally and you will never have to cross roads when the signal shows Red !!