The Psychology of Being Unshakable
Life Leadership:
The Psychology of Being Unshakable, of being Hardy:
Have you ever met someone who stays calm and steady, even when everything around them seems to be falling apart? While most of us get upset over a harsh word or an ignored message, some people remain centered and peaceful. What's their secret? It’s not luck—it’s mindset. And the famous psychologist Carl Jung offers valuable lessons to help us become emotionally strong and grounded.
1. The Mirror Effect
Jung said, “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
This means that when someone upsets us, it’s often because they are reflecting a part of ourselves that we don’t like or haven't accepted yet. He called this the shadow self—the hidden parts of our personality we don’t want to face.
For example, if a proud person makes you angry, maybe deep inside, you fear being overlooked or not good enough. When we face and accept these hidden parts of ourselves, we stop being easily triggered. Every upsetting moment becomes a chance to grow.
2. Don’t Carry Others’ Emotions
Many of us absorb other people’s moods—especially negative ones. One rude comment can ruin our entire day. Jung believed this happens because we haven’t healed our own inner pain.
Try this simple trick: When someone is being negative, silently tell yourself, “This is their energy, not mine.” Picture a protective bubble around you.
Don’t let every word in—only accept what feels helpful. When you know your own worth, you stop depending on others for validation. You become emotionally free.
3. Be the Observer, Not the Victim
Instead of reacting quickly to every situation, Jung encouraged us to pause and observe. Ask yourself, “Why is this bothering me?” This short pause gives you power.
Imagine you're watching your life like a movie from a balcony. You see what’s happening, but you don’t let it pull you in. Jung once said, “I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become.” You have the power to respond calmly, not emotionally.
4. Your Past Isn’t Your Identity
Just because you were hurt in the past doesn’t mean you’re broken. Jung explained that people often repeat old patterns without realizing it. Someone who hurts others may be acting from their own pain. When you see this, you stop taking things personally. Their behavior is about them—not you.
5. Question What You Believe
Much of what we think—like “I must always say yes” or “I’m not good enough”—is learned from others or society.
Final Thought
Being unshakable doesn’t mean you feel nothing. It means you understand your feelings and choose your reactions. As you grow in self-awareness, you stop being ruled by the world—and start ruling your inner world. That’s true power.
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